Emotional Cleansing

I have a one-on-one counseling session this morning. I call the sessions my emotional cleansing. Grief is a complicated thing. (Understatement).

A friend of my sister's said "Stay away from the black hole". I call it my dark place. I spent 4 days last week in my dark place. I started this blog while in my dark place. I made it to Jes' house, and my dark place receded. The last 4 days have been spent living a regular life. Thank goodness for that.

The thing about therapy (especially group) is for that one or two hours, grief is the focus. I try to imagine what the other members are like outside of the group. It is hard to imagine them going to work, cooking dinner, laughing at jokes. But we do. Sometimes/usually.

Last night, we were watching TV, and the people on the show (reality show), were angry, yelling, cussing, fighting with each other, and my anger started. Jes changed the channel, and my anger subsided. There was no thought or plan. I wasn't even really paying close attention to the show. But, I got angry. Anger sneaked right up on me.

I need to tell my story this morning. I need someone to listen. Hopefully, I can make some progress today.